A few days ago I was lucky enough to catch an early return flight to Philadelphia from Chicago’s O’Hare airport, getting the last seat on the plane, five hours before the next open flight.  To top that off, I was directed to a priority security line, with about 20 people ahead of me, instead of a snakelike line of several hundred mid-afternoon travelers.

After a few minutes, I noticed that my line was barely moving.  I soon realized the the problem:  TSA was using one of the new full body scanners, which was taking 40 to 45 seconds or more per passenger.  Although the process should speed a little with experience, anyone who thought about the purchase of these devices following the failed “underwear bomber” knew that delays would be a problem, and that their purchase and use would not pass any reasonable cost benefit test.  A “few” extra seconds per passenger adds up to a lot of time and misery for hundreds and millions of passengers.

I griped to a few people next to me in line, but I otherwise “assumed the position,” not wanting to be hassled by anyone from TSA.  We know that any given TSA employee can ruin one’s day, even if that person is one of the many who don’t relish the power to harass and humiliate a weary business traveler, a senior citizen, or, at one time, my 12 year old daughter (those early-pubescent backpacks among a vacationing family are a real threat).

When I finally reached the front, one of the 4-5 TSA employees working the line waived me through the normal scanner, apparently because the “priority line” had become a bit of a joke (or perhaps because I had already stripped to my underwear).  Let’s hope that such wisdom (by the TSA) becomes common.

U.S. airline security procedures are the real joke.  While a few (infrequent) flyers probably feel safer and are happy to suffer, the rest of us take it, out of fear of reprisal, , inherent docility in the face of bureaucratic oppression, and inability to organize.  If we could organize to stop flying or at least cut back significantly until sensible policies were adopted, we could quickly slay the TSA monster.  But that won’t happen.  Baaahh!